Regardless of the situation, no matter how hopeless the outcome may be, I will never quit, and I will never back down. I have become the wolf.

Posts tagged ‘fighter’

I just got the best gift ever


Two weeks of mental and heartfelt fighting spirit was just handed to me.  C. brought both of the kids by and we played for hours.  I know I should have spent more time talking to C. and Joe, but I love seeing my grand babies and the changes that occur in between each time we see them. 

H. is becoming more and more verbose every time I see him.  Today  I got a full dissertation concerning Whale Sharks including chalk drawings and everything.  I also learned about symbiotic relationships (A symbiotic relationship is one in which one organism lives off another and both organisms either benefit, or there is no detrimental effect to either organism. An example of this is mistletoe or spanish moss living off of a tree.) between animals.  Keep in mind that he’s only 4.  I also got a full demonstration of all he’s learning in Karate.  I get such a thrill out of him cause everything he does is so exciting and thrilling and he gets such joy out of retelling the stories and the facts.  And I love to encourage him.  I ask him questions and if he know, he’ll tell me.  If he doesn’t know the answer, he’ll tell me “Gramma, I’m not sure, I’ll tell you next time”.  And he does.  He remembers and answers my questions.   He loves making up games and having me play the bad guy, ’cause he’s always good.

I. is becoming a little girlie girl.  I picked her up a doll to play with and she carried the baby all over the house.  She’s starting to talk so well.  She calls me Umma (the only spelling close to what I think she’s saying).  Her beautiful face gets prettier every time I see her.  She has a glowing radiance of a very happy, well-loved child.  The best part of seeing her is the huge smile that spreads crossed her face every time she sees you.  Her arms go out and she wants “Love”.  I’m more than happy to provide it, all day long.  Gramma got a new rocking chair and she discovered that if we snuggle on it, it rocks better so every time I sat in it, she crawled on my lap.  The best part was when she would point to the pink tat on my chest and say “Me” and point to herself, then she’d point to the blue star and say “Harp”, then pat her hand on her heart and say “love”.   Those two little bug butts are going to keep me around for a long time.

C. looked good.  Like he’s losing some weight and firming up.  Joe is also looking a bit smaller in the overhang area.  They both work too hard.  Like father, like son.  I was just so happy to see him and get a big hug.  Nothing arms you better for battle than a good strong hug.

Dinner last night was amazing.  The Whitney is one of the most beautiful places I’ve ever seen.  The detail in the architecture is spectacular.  The food was delicious (except for a few undercooked scallops).  We left happy and full.  Mom didn’t get home till after 11:00 so Joe waited up for her, I went to bed at 10:30 and racked out when my head hit the pillow. 

BTW, the shoes rocked.  The most comfortable “strappy” shoes I’ve ever worn.  I’m going to try to get a picture. 

Huggs to everyone.  I hope your weekend is a great as mine, and if it’s not, drop me an e-mail and I’ll add you to my prayer and white light list.

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So, did the biopsy thing this morning.


If there is a level of fear below scared shitless, I’m there. 

Apparently when the surgeon found a “really promising” gland and cut into my neck, there was a tumor attached to the gland.  Really not a good sign for someone with a cancer history.  She was able to remove it and send it in for tests, but I have to wait till Wednesday for results.  Then on Thursday I see the oncologist to find out what kind, what stage, where it’s at….  So, pins and needles till then.

The good news is that I’m sporting another rockin’ star on my neck that is about an inch long.  Right in front, above the collarbone.  I get to scare little children for another year till it starts to fade.  Yeah, yeah, quit bitching about a little scar, others have it worse than you.  I allow myself to vent once, play the pity party for 10 minutes then I pull up my big girl pants and get on with it.

Joe did agree to let me go ahead and get another tatoo.  I just need to find a local artist who does amazing dragons.  I have always had an affinity with dragons, and have felt many times to be protected by them.  I have had the same dragon in every car I’ve owned.  He’s been with me for 30 years and he watches out for me.  So, I’m getting a dragon on my left front thigh.  I have a tremendous urge to get it done quickly.  I’ve been dreaming of a dragon for the past several nights, so I know what I want it to look like.  Lots of reds and yellows and orange, really scaly and fierce.  Lots of fire and teeth.  I need a fighter.

OK, I’m off to bed.  I think I’ll take a pain med and zone.  Night all.

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