Regardless of the situation, no matter how hopeless the outcome may be, I will never quit, and I will never back down. I have become the wolf.

Posts tagged ‘family’

Sunday brushes off the dust of another week

New photo’s of an old room for your entertainment.  M & M came by last week and helped tape and paint the “horrid white room” and turned it into a picture of spring.  I love the Midori tone to this color.  It makes the room shine.

pre green room

M paintingB paintingM PaintingAlmost Green Room

Finished Green room

Finished green room1

This is the almost finished product.  I’m re-varnishing the floors right now, then we can put the furniture back in.  I need to get curtains and a comforter to match the room, put up a few pictures and some knickknacks on the shelves and we’ve got ourselves a great spare bedroom.

This is a beautiful glass piece we got to add to the living room.  I love it.  Made in Spain from recycled glass we picked it up for next to nothing.  We got 75% off the 50% off the 20% off the original price.  I love Art Van for things like this.  They buy tons of it to make their showrooms look good then move them to a corner of the Clearance Center where they keep getting marked down.  Most people wouldn’t have looked twice at this bottle #1, cause it’s huge, it stands even with our fourth stair riser, #2 it was a weird color in the store.  The fluorescent lighting made the white swirls a dingy grey color.  I almost passed it by too. Something in it interested me though so I took it outside to see it in natural light and it was beautiful, heavy, but beautiful.  I love buying special things for my home and not paying a small fortune for them.

New Vase 

And now my favorite part of the show….. my Orchid garden.  How wonderful it is to wake up every morning to see this amazing array of orchids.  Every morning greeted by the promise of spring, especially with the thick snowfall in the background.



It was a rough end to the week.  We had everything planned to head south to visit C & L and the Grands but I got stomach flu again.  I even volunteered to go to the doctors it was so bad.  I knew what she would say, “Plenty of liquids, B.R.A.T. diet (banana, rice, applesauce, toast)”.  I usually fight going to the doctors but I’ve been so sick so often lately it’s starting to bother me.  I know my immune system is shot which makes it less enjoyable to go out and do things when you know you are going to end up sick in a few days.  Even something as an innocuous as going to a comedy club will bring me to my knees.  It just sucks.

OMG, new reality show alert, or maybe it’s old and I’m just behind, whatever.  It’s a reality show about biker gangs and their funny wars.  The show I watched showed rival gangs  fighting over the colors they get to wear.  Big, tough, biker dudes gonna duke it out over the colors.  Seems kinda girly to me.  So did the fight scenes.  I’ve fought tougher girls in the day.

Nine am dentist appointment tomorrow.  Last two fillings and a cleaning.  Yippee.  Then Thurs. I get my CT scan after three months without chemo.  I’ve enjoyed the three months free of chemicals, but I’m ready to do what my doctor tells me to do.  And that’s stretching for me.  Giving that much power to someone.  Scary.

OK, I’m off to seek refuge from this hectic mind whirl with slumber, or perhaps a brownie then slumber.  Peace out all.

What a wonderfully busy weekend

Saturday we had T & C over for dinner.  I made lasagna (frozen) and C brought salad and cheesy garlic bread.  We sat for several hours just talking and remembering and laughing.  It was a good night.

I started the Neurotin last night and I’m not saying it’s better, just different.  I was up and wandering the house at 4 this morning.  Fell back to sleep around 6 and slept till noon.  M and M came by today and we made homemade pizza’s then played cards.  It was great having company for the weekend.

So today I went out and did what any other self-respecting grandma would do on a cloudy day.  No, I did not do the big K.  I kept my tattoo appointment.  What an experience.  First I couldn’t find the place.  If you’ve ever driven through West Bloomfield during the day you know that the roads are nuts and the drivers even nuttier.  My trusty GPS sends me to an abandoned building in the middle of the biggest traffic snarl I’ve ever seen.  I’m kinda freaking out at this point.  I call the place and he’s all like, “yeah, GPS doesn’t work real well out here.  Too many cars.”  So he guides me in (I was two buildings away) and we get started.


Very first ink (for this tat)

First Color

Getting ready to nap. Or at least meditate.

The finished piece

I’m so happy with it.  I can’t wait till it settles down and I can see the true colors.  I barely bled  on this one at all.  And I did catch a nap while he did the fill in.  I was comfortable.

It’s getting late and I’m getting tired.  I hope you all found at least three things to smile at today and at least two reasons to laugh out loud.  I know I did.

I have chemo tomorrow at 1:30.  Spare a thought, white light, or a prayer for me.

Another weekend over and I’m exhausted again.

If  it wasn’t for Joes PT I would have slept all day today. Did so much running this past week and weekend.  I’m not used to being this active and I’m paying for it now.

Friday was run errands day, Saturday, Went to the Baptism for four beautiful little ones.  Two girls and two boys.  Children of someone I watched grow up.  We lost contact several years ago, so I was surprised to be invited, but wonderfully blessed to be included and welcomed back.  Seeing her brothers and sisters and their children touched me.  They have all done so well for themselves.  Between them they have 23 kids and they all live within three blocks of their mother.  What a blessed grandmother she is.  She is so involved with their lives.  I truly envy her getting to see all her beautiful babies every day.

I did get to visit a bit with my grands yesterday.   C&L spent the night at ex’s house and came by here after breakfast.  I love spending time with my grands.  It seems that I never get to see them.  They are growing so fast.  I guess that’s why I envy Apple her  babies so much.  There are days I want to chuck everything and move to their town just to be more a part of their lives.  But I’ll take what I can get when I can get it.  I can’t wait till they are older and have computers that I can Skype on or they get on FB or even e-mail.  Right now it’s hard to even get a hold of them.  I wish there was a way we could connect more on a weekly basis instead of quarterly like we do now.

So now I’m off to torch for a while.  Need to spend some time in creative mode.


Not used to being the caregiver anymore

Wow.  All I can say is wow, and thank you to my husband for taking care of me for all these years.  It’s not easy taking care of someone recovering from surgery.  We tend to forget how easy it is to do simple things.  It’s easy to get irritated when they do the run on get me’s.  (could you get me this, and this, and this, oh and while you’re up could you)  Things like running to the bathroom, or get a glass of water are an ordeal for the recovering.  I do remember this.  I remember the impatience.  No-one does it right, or like you and you bite your tongue because you don’t want to seem ungrateful.  It’s a natural feeling.  We all get used to doing things our way and when our ability is hindered we tend to get short-tempered and needy.

Imagine me, already in that state, caring for two people, one who is just entering that state, and one who wants to be there but I won’t let her.  We have already determined that I can’t take both of them anywhere in my car.  Joe has to have the passenger seat, with it pushed all the way back.  In that position, mom can’t get into the back seat because she can’t get in the driver’s side.  That would mean getting in the vehicle using her right leg first and her joints don’t move like that anymore.  So, I have a great big car and can only get one at a time in it.

If anyone is interest, here are photo’s of Joe’s new knee.  The first one was taken on the day he came home, five days after surgery.  The second was taken today.  The massive swelling has gone down, and while no-where close to normal size it’s looking more like a knee and less like a football.

7-28-12 First day home. The swelling is massive

8-2-12 – 65 degree flexion this morning. He’s doing really well.


Tomorrow I take mom in for her first major teeth cleaning in about eight years.  She is gonna be one sore woman for a few days.  I’ve got to stock up on chicken noodle soup.  Maybe I’ll make a pot today.  That would help all of us out.  With homemade polish drop noodles.  Stomach filling food.  I’m off to forage the freezers for chicken.  My idea of hunting.

Have a great day all.

Another year older, and still no wiser

Had a great birthday yesterday.  Even though Joe was in the hospital and I missed him, Mel stepped up and covered him in the best possible way.

It started with me getting to sleep all day.  The Alitma kicked my ass this time and I was so smoking tired.  The moms let me sleep, in my bed, till two in the afternoon.  While I slept, they took it upon themselves (bless them) to freshen up the place.  So one mom dusted and swept and the other mom did windows and mirrors and when I got downstairs the place shone like a new penny.

Having moms here is a strange and wonderful experience all at once.  It’s like falling down the rabbit hole where you are once again the child, hearing mothers voice.  But you are also the parent, because now it’s on you to schedule appointments, buy the food, make sure meds are taken and on time.  Kind of a convoluted world.  One day at a time, one day at a time.

Mel took me to a really unique taco bar in Ferndale.  The first one I bit into lit me on fire.  My gums are still tingling from the peppers.  The second one was a sweet chicken and it was really good.  Then we went to a painting class.  I have never painted in my life, always wanted to try it, but never did so this was a treat.

It was a cool class.  Everyone created the same painting, but everyone’s was different in the end.  Of course, Mel’s looks amazing.  Mine looks like something a pre schooler would do on a bad day, but it was a blast.  Will definitely go again.  Next time with a bottle of wine though.

On our way to the class C & L and the kids called and serenaded me with the birthday song.  I get a smile in my heart just hearing their happy voices.

It was a great day, but now Joe is home and I’m going to join him in a nap.

The very best sight, the very best sound, and the very best feeling.

The very best sound is the sound of my house ringing with laughter of family and friends.  From elderly to infant, we had them all at our house  Saturday.  It was a perfect day.  Hot, with a bit of breeze, the pool was perfect, the food was amazing (thanks again for grilling C.)  Everyone brought something to pass and the variety was wonderful.  Several times I just stopped and listened and found myself wishing for things that can never be.  I got way too much sun and slept for two days after, but that’s OK.  It felt wonderful.

The best sight was waking up Sunday morning to my granddaughters sweet face peering over the edge of the bed and asking in her sweet voice, “can horsey wake up now?”.  We have a bouncy horse with springs that she loves.  She will get up all night and bounce on that horse, so Sat. I put horsey to sleep in my room.  He couldn’t wake up till I did.  She did wait till she heard Joe talking to me.  Such a sweetie.

The best feeling was the hug my grandson gave me as they were leaving.  I told him I needed a good long cuddle and he held me for at least three minutes.  That’s a long time for a five-year old.  He smells so good.  No matter what, he always smells the same.

Today I went in had some blood work done to test my thyroid to see if medication can correct its issues.  So, I find out Friday.  I did weigh in at 118.8 today so I’m up three pounds.  Man, I work hard for those pounds.  Since I’m never hungry, and have a hard time swallowing when I am, I tend not to eat much.  So every morning I make my big ass cup of coffee with three heaping scoops of carnation instant breakfast and a 1/2 cup of whole milk.  I need to look into a protein powder since protein adds muscle.  At least no-one told me I was “too skinny”.  I hate that.  They remember me at 189, so to them, I’m too thin.  I think I’m fine.

I’m going to call it a night.  Sweet dreams everyone.  I’m in the process of learning how to crochet a sock.  We will see how it turns out.



Am I the only antique out there

who still cuts herself shaving her legs. I have huge bleeding gashes on both Achilles tendons right now. After 35 years of doing this, you would think I’d have it down pat, but not so. Also considering I learned with this: you would think I’d be really careful. But not so. I still rip my skin off every time. And I know there are alternatives out there. I’ve tried them all. Waxing, stringing, that machine that rips the hairs out, laser, shower goo, out of shower goo, tweezing, hell, I even gave chemo a shot, but it grew back. Let’s look on the bright side, at least I didn’t rip the fronts of my legs off like I usually do.

It’s been a really rough night and day. Couldn’t sleep last night, tv kept Joe up so at 2:30 I came downstairs and watched tv for the rest of the morning. Watched the sun come up, listened to the birds sing. Then passed out till 12:30 in the afternoon. Which isn’t a bad thing until you consider that we have two guys climbing up and down the outside of our house repairing brick in the fireplaces. Lots of hammering to remove damaged brick and mortar, falling bricks hitting the wood decking outside the family room. I slept through the whole thing today.

I’m so close to finishing the Teddy bear that I’m crocheting. This is the biggest animal I’ve made so far. The body and head are 20″ tall. I have to finish one leg, do the ears, stuff and assemble. Final touches will be the nose and mouth and he will be ready. He has taken me a long time to finish. I’m proud of him. I’ll post photos when he’s done (which may be tonight).

Have a wonderful Wednesday all.

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