Regardless of the situation, no matter how hopeless the outcome may be, I will never quit, and I will never back down. I have become the wolf.

Was kind of in a fog yesterday. Went to the Radiation oncologist for my first appointment. The good news is that they are going to wait till after my second chemo round to see if the cancer cells are shrinking without radiation. If they are, Party, if not, radiate. Radiation will be hard this time. They will be shooting around my vocal cords thus rendering me speechless for several months. Doc told me that my throat will be sore for at least 6 months after ending radiation, possibly a year. Not scratchy sore like a cold, but like you’ve been hit in the neck with a tire iron sore. Kinda like now, but worse. Swallowing will be a concentrating experience. No saliva either. Plus the fact that they might have to overlap radiation fields from last time, which is bad. Your cells can only take so much radiation before they stop holding together and lesions form.

So, Lucky me 🙂 I get to maybe miss all that. I’m guessing it’s because the cells are so widespread and there is no direct tumor to radiate that they are going to wait and see.

oncologist today at 3:00. Really have no idea what is in store for me there. It’s all kind of hurry up and rush to get there, but really don’t know why you’re there at all. I will find out today though. I have my list of questions ready. I know what drugs I’m getting, I’ve done my homework. I’m ready for this. Did put a shout out to my LE friends for cards, letters, things to read, funnies. Anything to pass the time. Same goes for here. I need all the cheer I can get. I’ve got my journal ready and everything will get printed and put in. That way I can read and re-read while I sit.
On a lighter note, I did get torch time yesterday. I just excused myself and went downstairs and fired up. Made some really pretty vessels. I think I’m going to fire up again. Mom’s still sleeping and Joe’s at work. I’m finding that vessels are a great way to use up single rods of glass. Not enough to make a set, make a big ole’ hollow vessel.

Hollow lampwork vessel.


Think of me today at 3:00. Send a flash of white light.

Comments on: "Wow, totally lost Monday" (6)

  1. Donna said:

    Hi Pal! You are in my prayers. Would like to invite you to a Healing Mass at my church St. Genevieve’s (Livonia) tonite at 7:00 pm if you are up to it. If not, I will be standing in for your intentions! “Lord, say the Word and I shall be healed”

    May the Peace of Christ be with you, in you, go before you!

    • sorry honey, I felt so bad last night. I hope you were able to stand up for me.

      • Donna said:

        Hey Girl, I did and I am praying the Chaplet of Divine Mercy for you every day @ 3pm. I believe in Miracles! Peace ^j^

  2. Sending out a WHOLE BUNCH of white light today at 3:00 and any other time I feel the need from here on in. (was already doing this sometimes, you are on my mind)

    You are an inspiration for so many in sooo many ways You go girl!!

  3. Melissa said:

    B – the vessel is amazing! Great work! Also, really think it’s great that you have this journal. Provides some good insight as to what’s really on your mind, for us. Here for you lady.

    BTW – again – happy to hear they are holding of on radiation for a couple doses. Staying positive about this one, that you won’t need it.

  4. Hi Lady … Hope this is a better day today.

    Keep good rest if you can. I am sure we are all giving you white light to carry you through.


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